Nakano Broadway, and Ice Cream Headaches

So apparently I do like shopping – just not the kind most people mean when they say the word. Because Nakano Broadway? The made my geek-lined heart soar!

Nakano Broadway. What is it? I'll tell you what it is – a mecca for all things terrible and geeky. Think of that nerdy basement dweller, and his collection of comics, figurines, and other assorted things most people's mothers threw out when they were away at camp in the fifth grade. Now picture well over three dozen stores packed with that stuff, laid out in just about the same way, now picture that on three floors and you'll have an idea of what Nakano Broadway is.

The thing is – you need to make your way down the shopping hallway to even reach its hallowed doors. And this is a problem because there is a sock shop on the way, and it has been discovered that sock purchasing is the most painfully side tracking thing possible. Sure, you don't think they have any value, but you're wrong. Do you want the regular socks? Toe socks? The Ninja socks with the one split in them for the big toe? And what style do you want?

A few years ago this would have destroyed me as well – when I teach drama I try to keep it real by wearing wacky socks. No shoes in the drama room, please.

But now? Now I just looked and thought wistfully. I accept that I am unemployed and may remain that way for some time once I return back to Canada. I'm not sure how long that will last – or what I'll do. Sure I'll make the moves to go back into teaching, because I quite like it, but if there is a problem getting a job, well there are other things I could be doing with my life. I'm sure, yeah?

So socks – not so important to me, though I understood their draw.

Next up? Wacky t-shirt place. It offered me a washroom, so I was all for that. I can appreciate t-shirts too, but a XL here, is like a medium back in Canada, and – well – look at me. That just won't cut it. So T-Shirt store is also of little desire. However, making sure I'll never fit into any of those clothes, I made my way to a Mackers for two McChickens and a Lemon Shaka Shaka Chicken (The most delicious McTreat of them all... Think about a Spicey Chicken patty in a bag, with lemon powder, that you shake and shake (or shaka shaka) until it's covered. That is an epic treat! Now think of putting the two McChickens together, and throwing in the lemon one to make Ultra Chicken delux.

Combining 100yen menu items to create monstrous creations is a wonderful new hobby of mine, I'm discovering. And it leads to tasty treats. In Japan they know how much mayo really belongs on their food. Bless their clogged hearts.

At long last it was decided that we would split up for a few hours and meet back. There is no way to stay together inside this place. And Mike's Girlfriend? I think she had better things to do than look at toys for the next few hours. I mean I can't imagine what girl wouldn't want to spend hours and hours going through the things I saw – but apparently some people just aren't into it. Crazy, I know.

So off I went to find the strange and bizarre that was being offered to me in this mall. What did I find? Well my first purchase was a little figure of two old people canoodling, naked, with each other for 200yen. Creepy, weird, and only from Japan. That's the way I approach things. Next up, I grabbed a Kingdom Heart's figure. For hours I searched through bags of opened capsule toys, and crazy wacky things, and just thought about how I wanted them all. And I also thought about how much I wish I just travelled here so I could bring home a pack of souvenirs. Again, it's probably for the best that that option wasn't open to me – but, you know, a boy can dream can't he?

For hours none of us ran into each other. It wasn't until just at the end that I saw Stew, and he suggested I leave the third floor. I guess that makes sense. But I needed the time just to see these things. There were eight different Mandarake stores here! None of them sold Layton. I had decided, after days of wishing and searching, that if I ever see him again I will just buy him – waiting is stupid, and subway fare to get out to a better deal would destroy the deal.

Layton! Why didn't I buy you before?!

And there, right on the second floor, between the Alien bust, and the Predator sculpture, just behind the – well – I'll leave those descriptions for my Akiba entry – there was Layton. Only 2200. I could deal with that. Done and done! Purchased, and escape! Back to the group meet up.

But this group meet up would have to wait, as Tsang, Tonia, and I were showed a picture of Stew's Ice Cream cone. Off we ran to get one for ourselves.

You need to understand this is no normal ice cream. This ice cream cone was bigger than my head, with eight different flavours soft-served on top of each other. This was the ice cream cone you dreamed about as a small child, but you could never convince your parents to get for you. It was under four dollars. Under four dollars! What could go wrong?

Ten minutes into eating it, I'll tell you what could go wrong. I had suffered through six levels of ice cream headache. Mike and Tonia, sharing, were at the same place I was enjoying every bite. I was on a mission to devour before it melted into nothing. Also – I have a beard. One foot of ice cream leaves terrible markers in the hair, so much that an employee came out from behind the counter with tissues, looking me in the eye stating, “perhaps you need a napkin?”

This does not happen. Japanese people, in my experience, will not suggest things to others, or make eye contact. I hardly ever catch people giving me looks in this country. They're ninjas at it! But this lady – all the way from behind the counter. I was a sight, to be sure.

Five minutes, and two more head aches later, I was polishing off my painful treat, just before Mike and Tonia had their last delicious bites. Jerks. Sharing. That's not the real way to do it.

They asked if Katherine would have shared it with me. Maybe – but more likely, we'd goad each other into buying one and then race to see could finish it first, health and safety thrown to the wind. Am I looking forward to this race, over a year from now? Somewhat. Other parts are dreading it.

And now I know why parents never let their small children have these cones. Still, if I have a child and they ask for one, you better be sure they'll get it. Learn your lesson through pain. Just like when they ask for chocolate, I'll give the 100% dark. That'll learn em!

Eventually things died down and we met up, ice cream in the past (and being craved, pain forgotten) then off to Ikebukuro to find some food.

Well we went to find an underground shopping complex, but failed. Then found an English pub where for six bucks we could have fish and chips. Look Japan, I know you think you know how to deep fry things, but that was not fish and chips! That was tempura fish. You better believe there's a difference. And putting pickles in Mayo does not make tartar sauce!

Still, you were a good meal, and less than six bucks. And you tried real hard, so there's that too. Still, fish and chips? Please.

As we all headed in our own ways to nap, planning on karaoke later in the night, it slowly dawned on us all that this would not happen. After all this rushing around, there was no way a nap could ever end. There would be no karaoke, just sleep – sweet sweet slumber.

Ueno, The Less Said the Better

Today is a day that will live on in the hearts and minds of us all.

We passed up going to a penis festival.

I know, right? Who would do that. Who doesn't want to see Japan's ten foot tall penis carried around? You could buy penis candy, and penis veggies and all sorts of other things shaped as penises. I'm told this has to do with warding off STDs. Probably not going to work – but maybe? Anyway, I'll never know. We didn't go there.

We headed to Meiji Jingu shrine, which is the Las Vegas of Japan, I'm sure. Within an hour we had seen seven or eight couples get married – with creepy voyeuristic photos of all of them. Still – it was a cultural experience, and there was a stamp at the shrine.

Then we went to Harajuku.

And this was a failed plan, because the costumed girls were not out, they were all in Yoyogi, which I must saw was pure madness. Once more Cherry Blossoms covered the world, and the sky was invisible under the canopy of pink. Last time I was here it looked like a bunch of ugly dead trees. Japan – one month of the year, it's Beautiful? The only 11? Well it's still not that bad, is it?

There was no patch of grass unclaimed by picnickers. Some of them had grabbed bags full of food from Mackers. These are my people! I've decided that when I get married, on the invitation there will be two options, Beef and Chicken. These are your meal choices. If you choose Beef, you get a Big Mac meal. You choose Chicken? Some KFC. Vegetarians will not be catered to. They can Brown Bag it. Someone else will enjoy their pick I'm sure.

I know what you must be thinking, right? Pure genius. Most weddings pay well over sixty bucks for the plate of gross rubber chicken, but here I have managed to cut the cost down to five bucks to something people will really like. Hell, if they're lucky maybe I'll toss them two Big Macs!

Look, my money was all sunk into this trip – just be grateful there will be food at all.

I'm sure future wife will be on board for this. How could anyone not be? I mean really – it's quite exciting...

Sorry – back to Yoyogi. There were people everywhere, and it was like nothing I'd ever seen before. On Canada Day you get something 5% of the madness here. But that's nothing. This was just beautiful, like out of a dream. I don't know what to say beyond, you need to experience the overwhelming image of people packed together in a social ritual fully regimented, as this is Japan, after all. It was cold, but the season said come out and eat together, and my goodness that's what they're going to do!

Two girls in pink dresses with loli umbrellas were photographing other people in the park. I tried to take a picture of them, and got the umbrella shoved at my lens. Oh I see how it is, they can take pictures of whomever they want, but forbid someone tries to shoot them. Yeah that makes lots of sense. Come on crazy dressed people. You must understand you make yourself a target, just roll with it. When people take shots of me, do I get all uppity and try to stop them? No – I look ridiculous, so they want a picture. Hypocritical sons of... well daughters, well anyway...

After Yoyogi we tried to board the train to head out near Ueno. This was a mistake. I'd never seen such a packed station with people shoving in and out to get to this one location. I should have known. It's not like we were not warned by Stew... Still – eventually we made it. The only regret? We didn't get to see the crazy elvises dance.

Ueno. Ah Ueno. We searched for a tea shop. We didn't find it. We sent Stew off on a mission to Turbo to it and report back. Ten minutes passed, twenty. He was not returning. A map showed the shop didn't exist in the direction we'd sent him. Would he run until it was found? Hard to say.

At this point I started to get tired. Yes tired.

Eventually he returned, and we headed to Ueno. But I was quiet exhausted by this point. And as I get exhausted I get a little loopy. By the time we reached the park it was all I could do to keep my head straight, but then – GIANT SWANS!

Stew and I ran to the swans for our lovely park date together. And sure, they were closing down, but no – we needed to ride them. I tried to explain this, and we were told fine (I think – he spoke Japanese) if we only stayed out twenty minutes and not the full thirty. They had to close, you see.

Despite the thrill I edged more and more to exhaustion on this ride and as such the ADHD inside of my came to the surface. Needless to say we made many new friends on this ride. Friends with people on the shore, friends with other folks in boats. My inhibitions had left me, and whilst I knew only two or three phrases in Japanese I made sure to get good millage out of them.

Eventually we got out of the swans, ensuring our full thirty minutes by being the last ridiculous boat back to dock, and then we headed out for some food. What a lovely moment, enjoyed by all. People on the shore tried to photograph us, but apparently we turned away right was we headed into frame. Which was too bad, i would have liked such a reminder.

At the food stand it dawned on me that I needed to use the washroom. I had been there earlier and knew it was just around the lake. What could go wrong? Nothing I thought. Oh how wrong I was. Sure I made it there, and yes it should have been a straight walk back, but in my confused daze late at night, I lost my way, walking one way around the pond, another way, never quite coming back. Over and over I looped the network of small lakes. Forty five minutes later – yes forty five – I saw in front of me, the glowing tower of edible goodness.

When I returned it was agreed upon that I not be allowed anywhere without a buddy. This was a good idea. I decided against telling them of my quest to return, wandering past giant birds (the ride from earlier) and meeting a huge talking beer bottle (a corona costume) – I knew what they'd think. Rummy. Rummy for sure.

When the time came to head out to Roppongi for the night life of nightlife Stew agreed to help locate my new digs with me. We had moved buildings earlier in the day. I feel bad for Stew, as I thought he knew where we were going. I certainly didn't. I would love to have seen a GPS tracking of where we ended up, as we circled back so many times. Eventually my crying aloud of the word “[insert anything helpful] doko desu ka?!” got us where we were going. More friends were made on this return trip.

And then I was asleep. And all was right in the world.

Why was my foot bleeding? Right – the rocks I tripped on earlier. Good times.

Tsukiji Fish Market and Ginza

Tsukiji Fish Market. What a wonderful thing that would be to see, right? Right? Sure – if it didn't mean getting out of bed at four in the morning.

I mean who does that? Who says, sure, let us wake up at four in the morning, and try to figure out how to take the metro down to a fish market so we can watch tuna sales? And what type of fish market uses itself as a tourist attraction catering to their desires to see this sort of thing?

Not Tsukiji, that's for sure.

Oh yeah – we made it there. And it wasn't that hard. And sure, you could walk around and try to check out the auction – but that's only if you don't really value your life. Everything about this place is a death trap. The workers would like nothing more than the crush you under their tiny little skid moving machines, leaving you as a red smear on the ground, a waring to all those foolish enough to follow in your blood splattered footprints.

Look out for anything that moves. This is not North America – they do not love you. They do not care about you. They will not face a lawsuit when they make you dead. You're on their ground, and they know it. The Russian tour group didn't seem to know it, looking around all proud as proud could be taking pictures. I swear, they must have lost three members this day.

Well maybe not, but I'm not kidding about taking your life into your hands.

There are two basic rules, 1. Never stop moving, and 2. Hug the walls.

The second you stop moving, a new vehicle is behind you getting more and more pissed off about the fact that you're in their way. They have a job to do. They were here at three in the morning setting up, and getting things underway. They don't have time to deal with your Gaijin crap! And you better always hug the walls, because even if they aim at you, trying to run you down, hugging the walls makes that nearly impossible.

Then you reach the auction and it's a new game. Sure you can try to take pictures, I suggest hiding with the Russian tourists, and when you see an official looking person come over, bail fast, and let the Europeans take the heat. If there is no large, more obnoxious, group – just stay away. Take one or two snaps, and bail. Because you do not want to be blocking the path for angry Japanese moving tunas, which are bigger than some of my little cousins, with giant hooks of doom. If there were a horror movie set here, you better believe these hooks would do in a pinch to kill, and then drag the corpse. Come to think of it, this is Japan and as such there have probably been a number of horror films set here.

Walking the market is no easy task either. You think you're safe in the narrow alleys, but you're not. Nope. Skid trucks are back, and they still mean to kill you. Best option? Same as before – but this time there are no walls, so you'll need to attempt to find an alcove to duck into. Problem: some of these alcoves are parking spots for the machines, and they'll yell at you, while not backing up to let you out. Sure they want you out, but they're not going to make it easy. The threat of death looms large in the air.

So how much do you really want to see those fish? Ask yourself that question.

Also – if you're in a large group, I suggest making sure there is an agreed upon meeting spot. Because you will get lost. And then others will say, “I'll go get him, I'll be right back.” which really means, “I'm going to go get lost. when the first guy gets back on his own, send someone out to find me, so they can get lost and repeat the cycle.”

On the plus side – sushi is good here.

Just don't order the soup if you're the least bit squeamish. What five prawn heads were doing hiding down there I do not want to know. Apparently some people think they're the bees knees, and as such they didn't go to waste – but seriously now, seriously... gross.

From the fish market we made our way to Ginza. Strange that the streets were empty, and no one was moving and shaking in this happening part of town. I mean it was already... right... nine o'clock. It was still only nine. Sure we'd all been up for hours, but other people? Fine. Forget Ginza. Time to go to the Imperial Palace and take the one picture that everyone who heads there takes. You've seen it before, no doubt. The bridge, the temple. That's all you can see. That's what everyone takes. If you go you'll take it too.

You may think you want an original photo that no one has thought of before. But you won't. You'll take it. Just be happy with that thought and enjoy your snap.

On the plus side, the park was full of Cherry Blossoms. They were everywhere. Sakura, as the Japanese call them. Why we call them Cherry Blossoms, I don't know – they have nothing to do with Cherries. And it just makes foreigners look stupid when they ask where all the fruit is. So please, can we change the name. Look I didn't fall prey to that trap, but it's not an unreasonable thing to think. We're not dumb – just uninformed.

Walking under the canopies of pink and white was a beautiful experience, and while the photos weren't as sharp as those I took in San Francisco, the experience was so much more. They were everywhere, covering everything. You couldn't believe the sights there were to see. Everywhere the petals fell from above, and rained upon the children playing, the picnickers festivating, and the limos leaving the palace under guard – wait what?!

Someone important was on the move, and people had gathered to see. Who it was? M'eh what do I know?

After a great amount of time looking at the gardens, and laying back on the grass enjoying the warm sun above (until it decided that we'd had enough, and it was time to bring out chilly cloud) we headed back to Ginza. This time there would be people. This time shops would be open. This time – things would be different. And they were. But we passed all the shops that would appeal to the enlightened around the world, and headed straight for Bic Camera. There I saw a Professor Layton action figure I thought about getting the day before – but 2000 yen seemed like a lot then. Now it was 2400. Again, I'd need to pass it up, not for that higher price... A flame ignited inside me. I must have that toy! But for cheap!

I did pick up a Schmoo Schmoo figure. Err – a Piplup figure. If you don't know what that is either? Good. It's for the best. It has something to do with those Poko-Mons that the kids rage about.

Also in Bic we used their free wifi on the iPhone display to try and track down the Godzilla statue. We found it. It was small, sad, and tragic. Just like last time I was here. I love that bloody statue. It has been disappointing tourists for years upon years! And there are few things I like more than a disappointed tourist.

Final Ginza stop? The Sony Store. That was the location I found my first space toilet years past. The buttons – so many buttons. Less said the better on this one.

Now it was home to 3D entertainment. There was a 3D TV is Bic, but it sucked. That's the only word to describe it. You needed to look at just the right height, angle, etc. Even then, no good. In Sony they had a 3D tv you could walk around and see from all angles. While this space aged holo tank might be useful for planning our Rebellion against the Galactic order, it has no real applications yet. But upstairs? Upstairs was their show room of 3D tvs, and after being set against them, I was finally sold.

It was – it was beautiful. Such resolution, such smooth frames, such wonder and beauty. And they demoed it with the most fantastic wild life footage, and video games like Little Big Planet, and Wipeout. I always thought Wipeout would make a great 3D game since I watched Avatar in Thailand. Now I am sold. Sign me up. When they come out, I'll back this new tech. Amazing.

In an adjoining room Mike was watching a video of 70 places to visit in the world. That was a shopping list for me. I'd seen maybe a dozen or so, but with so many left unvisited by myself, I tried to remember, make a list, and look them up later.

[Authors note: They have all been forgotten now.]

And then, as they day began to slow, we headed for some food – tickets purchased from a vending machine... which is how all food should be. I don't want to deal with waiters, tip them, or have them pretend to care when they don't. I want to pay before I eat, give them a ticket, and when I wanna leave I can, no strings. Come on rest of the world, pick up on this wonderful idea. Please. Please!

That was that. Day two in the books.

NHK Studiopark, and Shibuya: Tokyo, Day One.

April 2nd. Our first day in Tokyo – and we discovered... stamps.

Being in three separate buildings we had to come up with a meeting time early in the morning. One by one we all showed up grabbing a bite to eat along the way. The 99 yen shop? A perfect place for all your edible needs. Ice cream bar? 99 yen. One liter of juice? 99 yen. All number of delicious treats? 99 yen! For three bucks you can be fully fed and on your way. Just before we took off, we had a mission to fulfill. A mission I wish I had known to undertake last time I was here. We were off to grab Suica cards.

These are the reloadable cards that you can pack with money, so instead of buying a ticket each time you ride, you just need to scan your pass, and off you go. You don't save money – in fact, you have to pay a five hundred yen deposit. But the convenience – the convenience. And – buying the card we passed by a stamp. How were we to know what this would lead to? It seemed nothing more than an innocent little stamp, but oh – it was so much more.

Some stamped notebooks, others stamped cards they were carrying. Me? I stamped inside my Jurassic Park novel. So much for dropping the book off when I finish reading it.

But that was time enough – time enough spent. We had a great big city to explore, and only – well we had days to do it, but really, Tokyo, it's more than you can ever really get to. Our first stop? Shibuya.

Before I go on, I need to take a moment to described our first meeting with people on the streets. Nick, one of the many travelling in our group, has unique shoes. And by unique I mean very strange, but also fantastic. They are toe shoes. Picture toe socks, now picture them as shoes. A family, mom and dad with little Timmy, and Billy, or some other such name were looking around outside of the station, and saw Nick approach. In their delightful American accent they went up to him and asked him about his shoes. Not being one to turn people away, he explained what they were for (something about fixing our feet which have been destroyed by modern footwear.)

As he was turning to leave Dad noticed a bottle of some Japanese drink grabbed at random from a vending machine in Nicks bag. Dad went on a speech about how much he loved that drink and enjoyed drinking it the past few times he was in Japan. He seemed to be talking a we bit slowly too. At this point I thought nothing of it – you know, Americans. But just as he was about to leave Mom decided to pipe up, “You know,” she began explaining to Nick, “you speak very good English!”

At this point I was too busy covering my mouth and running away – bursting with laughter – I have no idea how this played out, or what was said. In my mind it was a snarky, “I should, it's the only language I've known and I've had 27 years of practice,” but being a better person than I, I'm sure he wasn't quite so cruel. He probably rolled with it.

Still – for days to come we will undoubtedly be reminding Nick how wonderful he speaks English, and what a lovely treat it has been for all of us.

I wish I could say that it was just Americans not being able to tell the difference, and the story would be delightful left on that note, but I must – in the interest of integrity – go on to explain that all number of Japanese have gone up to my friends expecting them to understand what they're saying as well. It's equally as delightful watching that play out. Still, nothing compares to the verbal pat on the head, of, “you speak very good English.”

Back to Shibya.

Shibuya is a district of Japan that has a lot going for it, but it rarely leads in any of the various categories. You've got the bright lights, but it's no Shinjuku East. You've got the toys and gadgets, but it's no Akihabara. You've got the trends and fashion, but it's no Harajuku. Still – it's a good cross section, and it's a nice place to start wading into the expanse that is this world class city.

We wandered the streets walking all number of stores. We were men on a mission. A mission of my creation, but one none the less. We were on our way to find Mandarake. This store is my Japan. Video games, manga, figures, collectibles of all types. Mandarake is wonderful, Mandarake is bliss, Mandarake is – closed... Too early for Tokyo. Fine then, there's always Harajuku and Yoyogi park. A new mission was born, and it took us north.

Never did we make this next district however, we were stopped right on the border. Right on the border lay NHK Studiopark. Sure we didn't really know what this was, but Domo was right outside, and the entrance was only two hundred yen. Even if it's terrible, it's less than half the price of a bowl full of noodles.

What lay inside was a magical wonderland beyond previous comprehension.

NHK allowed up opportunities to do all sorts of terrible things, such as voice acting for animated cartoons. Into the sound booth we went, and were given the chance to watch a brief bit of a scene, and then re-dub it to our liking. It should be said that Tsangerang and I should never be allowed in the same room together. Especially given the chance to do voice work. especially over a child's cartoon. It's for the best that nobody outside our group spoke English, and we'll leave it at that.

Next up was a trip to “Cool World.” Well, not so much Cool World as the less seedy Japanese child-like equivalent. Five of us stood in front of a blue screen, while the sixth filmed the monitor on the outside. Pressing a button the procedure started. A small cartoon character came up to us, and started to walk around us. Within moment we had regressed to the state of hyperactive children, all trying to grab the little cartoon in the virtual space. He then began to fly, and instinctively we looked for him, mirroring our actions to fit with what was being displayed on the screen. And though we stayed in the same spot, once the screen changed to that of an undersea world we felt the need to mime swimming actions. Anything else would just be ridiculous, you must understand.

There was no capturing the critter, and eventually we were defeated by a large octopus. Still – it was a true delight.

The final event of interest (which isn't to say that it was the final thing worth doing, as you can watch morning shows be recorded, listen to live radio shows and watch as they're broadcast, and – if you read Japanese – learn the history of the programming. Also there are many creepy children's show characters to take pictures with as well. But the final event was in the News broadcasting room.

What I gathered from the small English blurb was that we would watch how a newsroom operates. A desk lay in front of camera and teleprompter. To the other side were the benches we all sat in. A Japanese woman stood up and introduced herself – I think – and then, apparently, asked for a volunteer. A little girl raised her hand. She was accepted. The woman continued to ask for volunteers – at least that's what I think she was asking for. Tsang convinced me that it would be in all of our best interests if I raised my hand. I protested that I had no idea what I was raising my hand for, but that didn't work as I noticed some how my fingers were extended up above my head, and the Japanese woman was now talking to me expecting me to understand her, as clearly I had understood her enough to put my hand up.

I stared blankly. She then looked at my friends, Asian as they were, expecting them to know Japanese. This too failed. Flustered, I was just directed to the front where I took a seat behind the News desk with my five year old co-anchor. Together we were going to pretend to read the news. At first thoughts of video dubbing came to me, and I wondered what I might announce as having happened – but again, there was a five year old beside me, and going off script would not be recommended in that occurrence. Just wouldn't be right. Besides, I had a sneaking suspicion that this employee knew more of my mother tongue than she was letting on.

Out came the scripts. The girl read first. I was only slightly terrified when I saw that it was all in Japanese. I didn't even know what direction the words went in. Up to down, right to left for those wondering. Just as my turn came, and I smiled and nodded like someone on day release from the hospital, whenever the host stopped speaking, I was handed an English script. The world became a little less terrifying at that moment.

I read with gusto and expertise, if I do say so myself, and was then directed back to my seat, full of excellent chest puffed pride at a News Anchoring job well done – and only a little upset I didn't get the chance to go off-script. Still, children and all.

Then, right before we left, I saw called to stand again, and was awarded with a pictre of myself behind the news desk that had been taken and printed out there. When asked a question, I once more smiled and nodded. This time it didn't seem to be enough, blank stares were aimed my way. On the fly I innovated, and stuck out a thumbs up. This seemed to do the trick.

Later I learned that I was asked how I enjoyed the experience. The thumbs up was a correct response after all. Good for me.

Best two dollars ever. Ever. EVER.

[authors note: it's now April 14th, and I'm starting to realize just how much I've done in the past two weeks. I am terrified of the prospect of writing up blogs for all these days. And yet they were so fantastic that I can't not. Ai ya.]

[Author's Note: April 22nd says hello. This is going to be a loooong day.]

Next up? Shibuya 109. I know this store for one reason, and one reason only – the video game The World Ends With You. Games based in Tokyo – and there are a number, are so correctly based in Tokyo that Nick managed to navigate his way around based on the maps he remembered from playing.

What we could not predict was what was inside 109. Ten floors – TEN FLOORS – of shop til you drop madness, girls only. We had previously spent some time in Mandarake, looking at all the geek stuff, and this was like coming out of your parents basement into something strangely foreign and distressing.

Sure there were guys there – but we doubled the amount. In our mission to find Mike and Tonia, who had left the nerdy underbelly of manga, and action figures, early we climbed the epic tower from floor one, to floor ten. There were some basements that also needed checking. Who would have thought that finding two Asians in a giant Tokyo shopping complex would be difficult?!

Each store was full of girls looking at one brand of clothing or another. I do not like shopping – and as such can not understand their ridiculous cries of joy, and shrieks of madness. They were, quite frankly, shocking and distressing. What was more shocking, however, was that in an environment with hundreds upon hundreds of pretty girls, there were no boys trying to pick up. Not one. Back home this would be a target rich environment towards where many would head on such a quest.

Here – no boys. Only the sad, dead eyed, ones being dragged along – knowing full well they are nothing but their female handler's purse.

There's only so much cries of the Japanese version of OMG that would could stand. And the smell of baby prostitute was overwhelming. Twelve floors had been scoured, and still we failed to find our missing members. Back to the dog statue outside of the station (also in The World Ends With You.) It's a well known meeting spot, and meet up there we did.

I think it's important in understanding the Tokyo geek culture, and how it differs from the fashion culture – sure you can pay five hundred dollars for a pair of pants in 109, and that may sound crazy – but in Mandarake, there was a two inch square sticker selling for over two thousand dollars. Puts it all into perspective a little, don't it?

From here on out, we needed to only wait for Mike to forge the unending sea of people that was the Shibuya crossing, and make his way to us. Then it was all illegible Japanese menus at skewer restaurants, automatic beer pouring machines, and resting up for the next day.

Touchdown at NRT

When I woke up from a two hour nap, time ceased to matter. Crossing the international date line, it had become April 2nd. I had not experienced April 1st. Slowly but surely, I caught back up to it.

Chasing the sun the whole way, people kept their windows shut trying to allow a sense of night to fall upon them. Some slept the full flight. Myself? Those two hours were all I would allow myself. There was so much to do, so many movies to watch.

A Good Husband was a fantastic movie about a photographer, and his wife – and their relationship that was less than perfect. It's hard to say more about it than that, but I would buy it if I could find it. The internet has very little information about it, through trailers exist. It is – however – very Japanese. So if you can get past that, you'll be in for quite the treat.

Then I watched The Rock. I had been thinking of this since I was in San Francisco, and had spread the desire to watch it to others. But it was nowhere to be found. Here, on JL001 the movie presented itself. It was fantastic, and wonderful, and lovely, and I kept thinking – been there, been there.

Watching movies, or reading books, that take place in a place you've been? Exponentially better.

At this point we were getting close to landing. In fact were we not delayed on ground, and a bit in the air, we would have touched down already. But no – the wacky clock kept saying forty more minutes. It said this for half and hour, before finally starting to count down below that time. Normally I'd have had no problem with this – but knowing that my friends were waiting in the airport, and that they might up and leave at some point, well that had me less than pleased with this situation.

Still, I tried to console myself by watching Ghost in the Shell 2.0 - I tell you what, the first ten minutes of that is all naked cartoon lady, and that's an awkward thing to have displayed on your screen. So instead I stopped that, and went to the back of the plane for sugar bun snacks.

At some point we decided to land. Smoothest touch down I've had. And as we were rocking left and right caught in some pretty bad turbulence until the moment before wheels down – well that was really quite impressive.

Off the plane I could feel myself closer to Japan, and my friends. All I had to do was clear customs.

Tricks with lines being roped off were made, and I ended up in the second row, three rows ahead of where I perhaps should have been. I did nothing wrong – just exploited a roping fault, quickly changed after I secured my place. Now I was close. I mean, still 1 hour before getting out of this super heated hell hole, but close.

Time passes, I get stamped in, I explain that the card asking how much money I had on me may read 100USD, but that I intended to get more from bank machines and use credit cards. This was not getting across. For the second time, I just said “I have friends here” and I was let in without any further questions. If in a bind at this border, just say those words, then all is well and good.

And in the lobby? A good collection of people I'd not seen for some time! Together we made our way to a bus, perhaps paid more than we should have, and ended up in Ikebukuro – where I stayed last time I was here. We were here just long enough to get on the JR line and head one stop over to Otsuka. There there was a jumble of checking into our rooms, and figuring that system out.

Cherry blossoms lined the street outside the window. Many wonderful things were here. But we were all pretty tired. Just a quick stop for dinner, and then back to crash. Day one in the books – but there was so much more ahead.

Welcome back to Japan... Oh how I've missed this country.

Off to Tokyo, Japan

Sitting in San Francisco Airport, waiting to grab my flight to Tokyo, Japan – and yes... I'm pretty stoked!

It's hard to describe my eagerness to get back there. I was grinning like a madman when I walked through security, which probably explains why rather than sending me through the metal detector, they sent me through some other monster that did magical wave stuff. One pat down later and I was through. America – they are not big fans of putting me into the country, but they're so quick at getting me out. And right now? I couldn't be more pleased.

I'm waiting to grab my JAL flight, and waiting for a new airline is kind of like waiting for a blind date. Will this airline be pretty? Will it give me my space, or be needy and stifling? Will it expect me to pay for dinner, or make an offer of its own? How does it feel about drinking? Will it want to watch a movie, or prefer silence and quiet?

Comparing dating to airplanes – clearly I did not date enough that this is the metaphor that strikes me.

Come on movies built into seats! That's all I want. 11 hours of god awful movies. And due to the wonders of time zones, I'll be rolling in to Tokyo around midnight, but it won't be midnight – it will be four in the afternoon. Oh yeah, after all those movies I will be all sorts of loopy, and that really, really excites me. Now if there are no movies, I'll have to read. But if I spend my time reading I will eventually grow tired, and then sleep, and then be much less loopy. And really, that's all part of the fun.

Also – I'm meeting friends at the airport, which means if I'm a wee bit crazy they'll help point me in the right direction.

In case of meeting problems I'm prepared with a print out of directions that will point me in the right direction. I have no real faith in this – but I do have faith in the phone number that is attached to it.

Boarding the plane, I delighted in the fact that there were built in movies. I selected Up in the Air, and watched corporate America go to work. It was charming, and didn't play out in the cliché way. For that, it gets my stamp of approval.

I then selected a Japanese Movie, A Good Husband, and began to watch it. Ten minutes in, I couldn't read the subtitles. I pressed pause, and fell off to sleep. Somewhere, due to the magic of time zones, March 31st ended.

Game Demo Day

[authors note: I am behind in blogging. In real life it's a few hours until April 6, but in this chronological blog date, it's only March 30th. I clearly have a lot to write, and would like to try and catch up. So, we'll see how this goes.]

Too many video game demos.

It's my final day in California, and it's my final day with video games. This means but one thing – play as many as possible before I lose the ability for some great time to come. I can't recall all the things I played, and that's probably for the best. There was a great collection of terrible in the mix. I'm now really starting to appreciate the difference between a good game, and a god awful game. And it's shocking that they still exist. Back in the day you could just flood shelf space and someone would buy your game, but in this world of demos, if you have a crap product – well then people will know.

It's a good thing most people don't research before they buy.

There was some terrible fairytale game that I thought was promising – it was not. There was a game called WET which you go and shoot people in bullet time, sliding, jumping, and wall running. If the animations were polished, and the game wasn't suffering from disconnected elements – such as the transition in and out of slow motion – it could have been something. As it was? Lame.

Then there was Just Cause 2. This had promise, but I failed at it, failed because I just couldn't get a handle on the Bionic Commander grapple hook. There seemed to be a lot of promise to this one though. As for Red Faction, which I'm told was lovely – I just couldn't get into it either. But I think this was just failing of the demo. The game seemed solid, I just didn't have a handle on the controls.

Then there were the good games. Games like God of War 3, which really made me want to go back and play 1 and 2 again. Well 2 for the first time. I noticed that the protagonist could fly momentarily using Icarus's wings. This implies that in an earlier game he killed said winged god and ripped them off. I would like to play out that section.

And Bayonetta. I was not expecting this to be as good as it was, but it was so slick and polished – and a whole lot of silly gun shooting, magic, tongue in cheek fun. Good for it being such a lovely game.

And then there were the downloadable games. There is a great number of cute little games that are small, and only a few bucks. The demos of these were pretty lovely too. Pixel Junk Eden? I highly recommend it. It's just a fun trippy game. And Fat Princess? capture the flag meets the internet shouting out ideas. The demos for both had a good amount of full game play – so even for one not looking to buy, it's worth checking out.

At six my buddy got back from work. It was at this point that I subjected him to the last two years of games, through demos. To this point the PS3 was mostly just a movie player for him. But this may have changed (and I'm not sure if this is a terrible terrible thing I've brought upon him or not.) But he saw Bio Shock, and Heavy Rain (what a demo – as wonderful as I thought it would be!), and all those mentioned above... except for the terrible ones, which I'd filtered.

Yes – that's me, filtering the terrible, bringing video game love to all the good boys and girls.

After more gaming we decided that would would probably be an acceptable thing. In this case? Burgers. Fridge burgers, with year old ketchup, and BBQ sauce that still seemed alright. Cutting mold off cheese made that just fine too.

Feast feast feast, and then that was that. Day over. Stay over. Tomorrow I will wake up and head on out to the airport. Huzzah!